Never go back
by Fee-tan
Summary: Well, this was ironic. I had officially started giving in to the demands of reality. I had studied and travelled. Hell, I had even reached my life-goal. And now there were fae in my living room.
1. The raven

**Never go back **

**Chapter 1: The raven **

_Finally, the now full grown witch saw his face. Despite the accident, it had remained beautiful. She sighed in relief as she-_

No way. That would make the heroine seem superficial. This would never do. Why was writing things so difficult? I slapped myself in my face. I shouldn't be so negative. I had a few more pages to go and after that my story would be finished.

_She sighed as she walked towards him. Her prince smiled._

No, the prince I had created never smiled. Ugh, this way it would take another year to write the story. Maybe I just needed a break. Like, a long one. With chocolate.

When I rose from my chair, I yelped. Some loud music -I believe it was _The_ _Sex Pistols_\- was pounding from the apartment above mine, making the whole complex slightly vibrate. I damned my neighbour, as I had done many times in the few months I had lived here. In my mind I preferred to call him the goblin, because I had always thought he slightly looked like one. Then again, I associated almost everything with fantasy. I had been an extreme fanatic one year ago. I had read a lot of books –_Lord of the _Rings, _A song of Ice and Fire, _almost everything by Bernhard Hennen- and sometimes I had… hallucinations. However, after I graduated as a nerd, I decided to give in to the demands of reality.

Still, my infatuation with fantasy had been what had gotten me into reality. My dream was to become an author, and to write good stories, even fantasy stories, you needed experience in life.

I had started travelling and socialising. I was currently in my second year of literary studies. Every night, after working myself to death at the local family restaurant, I went home to work on the second draft of my story like a maniac. My family honestly didn't know if they had to be proud or afraid of my sudden change.

However, it could have been all for nothing.

When I got used to the trembling of the apartment I stretched my arm in order slap my laptop shut, but I pulled it back as soon as I heard the glass of my window shatter.

It all happened extremely fast.

I jerked my head to the left, where the sound came from. Two forms where flying… or falling across my apartment. One of them was a huge black raven, the other creature had somewhat animalistic features. The raven's green eyes glinted before the animal flew straight through the door. The other thing –I wasn't quite sure what it was- growled before jumping after the raven. Its leg somehow got entangled in the wire of my laptop and dragged the device along with him.

I stood there speechless, my mouth agape –making me look extremely intelligent- before realizing one thing. My laptop. My story. My life-goal. It was gone.

Oh hell no.

Without thinking I chased the creatures that had just invaded –and partially destroyed- my apartment. I could barely see them at the end of the hall. My laptop was still being dragged with them. Anger boiled up from inside of me. I barely thought of the fact that the beings I was chasing didn't look normal at all. I just wanted to get my years of work back.

They sure were fast, but with desperation flowing through my body, I wasn't slow either. Outside, I almost cried out in pain because of my naked feet touching the cold snow. The raven had mysteriously disappeared and now the creature that had abducted my laptop was getting chased by someone with bright red hear.

The three of us ran towards the park. The redhead and the creature were still trying to kill each other, while jumping over branches and dodging trees.

"Wait, for God's sake!" The redhead turned around and smirked, before throwing something shiny at me. I fell flat on my stomach in my effort to dodge the thing. It flew right at the place my head had been seconds ago.

When I got up –while being slightly out of breath- I noticed the park was nearly deserted. No wonder, a lot of people had gone somewhere else to celebrate the holidays.

When we all reached the willow in the heart of the park - the place where I always went for inspiration- a light emerged from it. It caused the tree to vibrate, making the snow and ice fall off the long branches. The animalistic creature jumped into the light quickly. The redhead wanted to follow, but I quickly pushed him aside and jumped in first. Something inside me feared the portal, or whatever it was, would close if neither of the creatures were around.

When I opened my eyes, I temporarily experienced a state of mind which some call 'braindead'. The place I had gotten myself into couldn't possibly be the park anymore. There were still trees all around me, but they had a .. majestic air. Plants that I had never seen in my life were glowing, moving softly because of a small breeze.

Oh, and most importantly, it wasn't winter.

"Are your eyes always that huge, or are you just that infatuated with my handsomeness?" a mocking voice said. I spun around on my heels. The redhead was smirking again. That was probably how he rolled. Barging into people's lives, pretending they were crazy, although everything was partially his fault.

I blinked, not knowing what question – or snappy remark- I had to throw at him first.

"Can you talk? Or do you communicate with your eyes?" the annoying redhead said, while making some weird movements with his green eyes.

"Where the hell are we?" I managed to say. Only then I began to take him in. His clothes consisted out of cotton and leather, mostly with greens and browns. He reminded me of _Peter Pan_, although something about him was different. Maybe the fact that he was behaving like a dickhead.

"Well, we surely aren't in hell. This place is called the Nevernever." Even the name of the place reminded me of _Peter Pan_.

Then, I saw it. His ears. Countless nights of watching _Lord of the Rings_ had taught me that this surely wasn't a human trait. Oh god, I wasn't seeing things again, right?

While reminiscing about my favourite movie, the adrenaline I had felt earlier slowly left my system, making room for some more questions. As I had mentioned before, hallucinations were not unfamiliar to me, and I was now considering –read: freaking out about- the possibility that this could be one of them.

"And what _is_ the Nevernever?"

The redhead made a wide gesture with his arms.

"This," he said jokingly. After he saw my murderous look, he only chuckled.

"The Nevernever basically contains Arcadia, also known as the Seelie Court. Tir na nog, the Unseelie Court and the Iron Kingdom. Oh, and there is also some realm in between the human world and the Nevernever, but that's not really important right now." He shrugged, which he did a lot. I got a feeling that this guy got some sort of pleasure out of acting like he didn't give a shit about anything, yet showing how much he knew, anyway. _If _he was telling the truth.

His anecdote sounded completely ridiculous. Although the name Arcadia certainly reminded me of one of my all-nighters behind the screen of my laptop, researching stuff. Sadly, I couldn't remember everything I had researched in all those years.

"I am probably just seeing things again. This is just a hallucination." I was speaking to myself mostly, but the douchebag I was talking to found it necessary to answer anyway.

"You wound me deeply," he said, looking genuinely amused, "your fragile human brain just can't handle how awesome I am." I snorted.

"I am sure I have, wounded you deeply, that is. Get off your pedestal already. Just who do you think you are?" His torso trembled with laughter. "I _know_ for a fact that I am Robin Goodfellow, also known as Puck."

Nerdy as I was, I had even read _A Midsummernight's Dream _entirely for my own amusement. This had to be my own illusion. I looked behind me to find the portal-thingy. Only to find it had disappeared. Was I trapped in my imagination now?

I slowly walked towards Puck. I knew for a fact that you couldn't touch hallucinations, so I poked Puck softly. And I definitely felt soft cotton.

"You getting fond of me already? I guess I shouldn't be surprised."

"You're real," I observed.

"Yes, although I can imagine it is a shocker for you to realise that such an ideal existence as myself is not a figment of your imagin-"

"And you claim to be... a fairy? An elf? And a very famous one too," I interrupted him sceptically. Puck rolled his eyes.

"Why thank you." He bowed playfully.

"We prefer to call ourselves Faeries. You don't believe in us then? Because I certainly am getting a boost of glamour thanks to you." He winked. Oh, that was right… people who… believed in them, or had a lot of imagination gave mythical creatures power. Well, shit, I hoped this one wasn't going to harm me. I knew for a fact that Puck wasn't _that_ evil. But other creatures I had read about sure weren't friendly.

"I… I, whatever. If you're Puck... you could help me get my laptop back, right?" I suddenly scanned the area around me. The other creature was gone.

"Sure, I need to catch the Phouka anyway. And something like a laptop could cause damage in Arcadia." Oh great, the first dangerous creature had already appeared. I sure hoped I was with the real Puck then, because I knew Puck was powerful.

I followed Puck when he began walking further into the woods.

"So what's your name?" Puck asked. Was it just me, or did he always have a shadow of a smirk on his face? His eyes had a mischievous glint as well.

"You won't do anything funny with it, will you?" He imitated an astonished face.

"If you're Puck you could fool basically anyone... And if I remember correctly, elves, Faeries, or whatever, can cause humans a lot of misery, only by knowing a name." Puck nodded.

"Someone did her homework," he joked.

"Also, promises are also binding, right? Oh, and you probably can't lie."

"You _do_ believe in Faeries," he said triumphantly.

"Hell, I should, starting from now. And, since promises are binding, will you promise not to do anything weird with my name?" Since he had complained about my huge eyes, I decided not to go for a puppy-dog face. Instead I tried to look intimidating. It only made him grin.

"Alright. I promise. If you don't look at me again as if I am going to eat you. I mean, it's fine if you're afraid of me, but you always look terrified." I frowned.

"I don't do that on purpose. It's because my eyes are too big." And maybe -definitely- I was scared. I mean, if all those fictional things were true, there could be a lot of potential danger out here.

"My name is Emilia."

"Emilia who?"

"Stevenson."

"Well, Emilia Stevenson, let's kick some Phouka butt!"


	2. The cat

**Never go back**

**Chapter 2: The cat**

We had been walking for a few hours. Puck had tried to find out more things about me, but I had remained quiet. I liked quietness around me. That's why I hated my goblin neighbour.

"Puck," I said, while he was in the middle of asking me yet another question, "what was the thing you were throwing at me before?" Puck grinned.

"Why would I answer your questions when you refuse to answer mine?"

"How can I trust someone who wanted to curse me?" Puck scoffed.

"I wasn't cursing you, I was trying to erase your memory, because most humans don't react well to seeing Faeries. I'm not planning to repeat the favour, because you seem to be one of those dreamy airheads who are used to seeing things all the time. So, tell me, what drugs do you normally use?" He scratched himself on the chin, imitating a therapist.

"That's not funny."

"According to _you_." I stuck out my tongue.

"That's the same thing." Puck's lip curled a bit.

"Your attempt at a joke is rather sad." I frowned.

"Who said I was joking," I said, while looking around me, taking in the not-so-typical fantasy woods.

"So, we're in Arcadia, right?" No one answered. I looked beside me and behind me. When I realised I was alone, I quickly checked the tree branches. If I was actually with Puck, or rather, _had_ been with Puck, he was powerful enough to transform into the raven I had seen. It had mysteriously vanished after all.

Still, there was no raven.

"Puck. What are you doing?"

Suddenly I was very aware of the dangerous situation I was in, now. Puck had been annoying, but cheerful company. He had made me forget about how miserable I had felt after losing my story, and how wary I had been for goblins, nymphs, banshees and the like.

While carefully searching the area, I wondered what I was supposed to do. I couldn't leave the Nevernever, I had no idea how. I also really wanted my laptop back. To be honest, I wanted to make the Phouka regret he had stolen from me. I wanted revenge. To traumatise the being so that he wouldn't dare stealing from anyone ever again. Yeah, I wasn't a very forgiving person. I had repaid people who had thought I was a pushover in the past.

And I would sure as hell make Puck regret leaving me alone in here.

Just around the time I had started thinking about Puck again, some huge animal emerged from the trees. I didn't take the time to see what it looked like, for it was best to run away immediately. Braches ruined my clothes, arms and face in the process, but I barely noticed. The thing behind me growled. While running aimlessly, I fell into a river. The creature gave me a hungry grimace and picked me out of the water with its claw. It was some sort of reptile. Scales covered its body and the pupils of its eyes had a feline shape. I trembled with fear when the reptile showed its large, sharp teeth. Its green eyes narrowed evilly.

_Wait a minute… green eyes…_

My body stopped trembling.

"Puck. Stop acting like an idiot and put me down."

The reptile vanished in a large cloud of smoke and I fell flat on my ass into the river. I swam out quickly. Who knew what kind of monsters lived in that water.

When I stepped out of the river, completely soaked, I was met by a grinning Puck, who at least had the decency of giving me a hand in the process of climbing out of the water. I wanted to refuse his hand, when he grabbed my own and pulled it a little too hard. I noticed a small amount on his face when our bodies collided.

"You were scared shitless," Puck commented, patting my back. The confusion in his expression, from earlier, had already vanished. When I looked him in the eye he did a small step back.

"Yikes," he said, watching my furious face.

"Asshole," was all I said. For now.

"And proud of it," Puck answered insufferably.

"Just why did you _do_ that?" Puck smirked evilly.

"Do you still doubt I'm Puck?" I avoided his eyes. I was sure they were glinting with joy.

"No," I said reluctantly.

"Well, there's your answer."

"About answers," I said, wanting to forget about the whole ordeal as soon as possible, "you still owe me one. So, are we in Arcadia now?" The faery sighed, as if my human ignorance frustrated him.

"This is the Wyldewood, a neutral place."

"So, no one really reigns it, right?" I said, thinking of Oberon and Titania, they probably ruled Arcadia. Then, who were at power in Tir Na Nog and the Iron Realm? Maybe creatures from _The Lord of the Rings _existed here as well.

"Something like that. The only that reigns here is instinct," Puck said, winking at me in the process. Ew.

"You must like this place then," I said, still angry.

"You really are a fantasy-nerd aren't you?" He said, guessing my previous train of thought about characters form other fictional works living here.

"I _used to be._" Puck pointed an accusing finger at me.

"You are still. If you weren't one, you wouldn't have been able to see yours truly and the Phouka."

"The Phouka!" I said in shock. The redheaded asshole gave me a curious look.

"I know the things I say are rather impressive, but you should refrain from quoting me."

"I wasn't quoting you," I answered annoyed, "we should continue chasing the Phouka. We're losing time, let's go." I marched away from the river. Puck appeared next to me.

"I hate to burst your bubble, but because of your slow human legs we have lost the Phouka hours ago, so now we're heading towards someone who can help us find him.

"Because of my slow human legs, or because _someone _decided it was a good idea to turn into a reptile? And who is this someone?" I said sceptically.

"By then, we had already lost him. And I was bored, so I decided to have a little fun." He only scoffed at my worn-out expression, before smiling mysteriously.

"And you'll see, about the one who's going to help us."

We walked for days and slept for short periods. Puck kept watch often, which was unexpectedly kind of him, though I didn't trust him enough to be completely at ease while I slept. My body was killing me. My tights were in tatters and my brown, sleeveless, turtleneck was covered in stains. Same went for my white miniskirt. No, that outfit didn't make moving easier. Not to mention I wasn't wearing shoes.

It was ironic. One year ago I would have died for a chance like this. Although I found Puck rather interesting –and evil- I was now actually dying to go home, and only visit fantasyland in my imagination.

I now believed I wasn't hallucinating. I had felt enough pain and touched enough sharp branches to know it was all really happening.

"So, where are you from?" The third day, Puck fired another question at me, and this time I answered.

"I'm English, and I live in England now, but I am originally from Belgium." Puck nodded.

"I thought you'd never talk to me again after all this. Some people actually do that."

" I wonder why that doesn't surprise me. Anyway, why exactly were you chasing the phouka?" Puck grinned.

"Orders from Lord Pointy Ears." I unintentionally laughed.

"You call Oberon that?" For a small moment, I thought I saw Puck's surprised face.

"I am Puck, The Great Prankster. What did you expect?" He grinned and looked at me expectantly, as if he expected me to bow in admiration. I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, so who rules Tir Na Nog?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You don't know already?"

"I don't know _everything_." He shrugged.

"Not so stingy, I was just joking."

"Of course you were. You always are." That was _one _thing I had learned about him.

"Mab rules the Unseelie Court." I nodded.

"Isn't that the fairy mentioned in _Romeo and Juliet_?" That was about the only thing about the story I still remembered. He laughed.

"Don't ask me," he said. I sighed. Perhaps I had made a ridiculous assumption. The real Mab was probably not like the one I had read about at all.

"Okay, I guess you are too busy with… being annoying, to ever have time to read it. But you've been around since, what is it, 1600?" He grinned.

"1595, actually."

"How can you be so childish when you're that old?"

"How can you be so stingy when you're that young, Bug-Eye?" _Oh great, he has already given me a nickname. _

"You're not going to ditch Bug-Eye anytime soon, are you?"

"Nope." That was totally unfair. His eyes were on the large side too, although not as big as mine. Maybe that was a Faery thing.

"Who rules the Iron Kingdom then?" I asked. The forest seemed to get a bit darker. I wondered if time was the same in the Nevernever. In some fantasy worlds time went slower. Puck remained silent.

"Puck?" I asked, looking beside me to make sure he hadn't ran off somewhere. The Faery was staring in the distance. Was he looking for our destination?

"Anybody home in there?" He turned around, seemingly distracted.

"What is it, Bug-Eye?" I really wanted to punch him then.

"Who rules the Iron Kingdom?" It sounded kind of, more badass than the other two courts.

"The Iron Queen rules the Iron Realm. Her name is Meghan Chase." There was something about him being distracted, and him slightly biting his lip when he said her name, that gave away he had some kind of history with her. A history that hadn't turned out right for him.

"That sounds kind of… modern." Puck rolled his eyes.

"Not every place in the Nevernever is full of medieval stuff. Well, most of it is. Just not the Iron Realm. And Meghan.." He stopped talking. That was another thing that proved my point. I decided not to ask any further, because I really needed his help and I didn't want to take the risk he would freak out about the Iron Queen all of a sudden.

"Ah, we're there!" He said, a bit smug. We were standing in front of yet another tree. It wasn't very different from the rest of them, though it had a bit more moss.

"Robin Goodfellow, long time no see." A sarcastic voice said. I looked up in surprise. The voice came from the tree. I wasn't about to ask a talking tree for help, was I? I almost sighed in relief as a grey form appeared. Because of the authority in the voice, I expected something majestic and surreal, like another Faery. Instead, a grey cat stared at us with sharp yellow eyes.

And he had just talked.

"Narnia, take me away," I muttered. Grimalkin reminded me slightly of Aslan.

"My name is not Narnia, human. You may call me Grimalkin, or Cait Sith. Whatever your simple mind prefers." I raised an eyebrow. The cat talked _and _he was arrogant. I didn't have the nerve to say anything about it though. I wasn't in the right place to.

"We need your help, cat. This kid here followed me all the way to the Wyldewood because a Phouka I was chasing took her laptop with him. We need to find him." Grimalkin the talking cat began to lick its paw.

"That's no problem. However, I do require a payment from the human." I looked at him warily. I didn't think the cat was interested in money. Still, I was prepared to do almost everything to get my story back.

"What do you want?" I asked, glad my voice didn't waver. Forget the brave Aslan. This cat was more like an animal version of Littlefinger. The Cait Sith –whatever that meant- looked up from its paw, watching me curiously.

"I want your name."

"Huh?" Puck seemed a bit surprised at this. Although I didn't really know why. I actually didn't care, either. I had expected something worse. Like, a Rumpelstiltskin scenario. And although I had done a lot of research, I didn't seem to remember any legend about someone losing their name.

"Why… would you want something like that?" I asked, a bit shocked. I had seen it coming before, with Puck, but now that it actually was happening I couldn't help but wonder why.

"I am a cat," was all he said.

"Of course," I answered, as if I knew exactly what he meant by that.

I didn't.

"Human, do you wish to continue this bargain?" I sighed, asking myself what the hell I was doing, and what the consequences would be of losing my name. I'd probably be called Bug-Eye for the rest of my life.

"I'll have to."

"Then, tell me your name."

"It's Emilia Stevenson."

**A/N: Thank you, guest, for your review ^^ I don't know when the next update will be, because I am kind of busy with another fanfic, but I intend for this fic to be not that long -10 chapters or so. **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! **

**~Fee-tan**


End file.
